Calming the Storm

But this time a stressor came on me from the outside that I didn’t know how to handle. It had nothing to do with the kingdom or my calling, it was completely worldly and I absolutely fell apart. I became angry, resentful, depressed, and felt like I was at the end of my rope. I wouldn’t listen to any words of reason or wisdom. I was defiant and stubborn and it sent me into a black hole.

It got to the point where I had to go outside under the night sky and scream and cry and pray. But I’ve reached a point where it physically hurts to cry, my forehead hurts so bad that I can barely stand it. So, as I was trying to manage the tears, the pain, and the hopelessness, God said, “Be still.” And it stopped. My tears stopped, my pain stopped, my hopelessness stopped.

I went to sleep that night knowing it would be ok and I woke up the next morning feeling that peace and comfort He promises. Then later on that day God put the story of Lazarus dying on my heart.

Lazarus and his sisters were close friends of Jesus. He heard that Lazarus was sick but did not go to him right away to let God’s power be shown. He knew God would raise him from the dead. However, when He finally arrived at Lazarus’s house he was dead and had been for four days. Jesus still knew God’s power would be shown but when He was taken to the tomb, Jesus wept. After He wept, he called Lazarus out of the tomb and he came out alive.

While we tend to focus on Lazarus being raised from the dead, this time God had me focus on the fact that Jesus wept. Jesus experienced the death of someone close to Him. And He hurt. He felt what we feel. Yet, He still had hope because He knew the power of the Father.

Our God is powerful and loving and faithful. He made heaven so much sweeter for me. I hope all these words help someone see how sweet it is and know that He wants us there with Him. He wants to bring us back to the garden, the place He intended us to be when He created us.